But sold out! Can't buy!

Here’s a wild little study that has flown under the radar. 

Two professors from the California State University in San Marcos, a dozen miles east of Encinitas, say they’ve conducted exhaustive research on wetsuits and the results ain’t pretty. 

“What the surf industry is marketing is not driven by science,” says Sean Newcomer, one half of the university’s Surf Research Laboratory, the other is Jeff Nessler, in a piece on Outsideonline.

The pair are helped by 40 undergrads, and the indoor “surf laboratories” feature motion cameras, a swim bench ergometer, a treadmill on hydraulics, even a surfboard simulator mounted on pistons. 

And, what Nessler and Newcomer discovered is that wetsuits are being made with the distribution of rubber thickness all wrong, ass backwards y’might say. 

Using thermal sensors to collect data on skin temps, “the data showed that the average surfer didn’t need the extra millimeters around their core (unless perhaps they were riding waves near the Arctic Circle). Instead, they needed the thickest neoprene over the lower half of their body—the calves, thighs, stomach, and lower back. Those were the regions submerged in water for the most amount of time and consequently the areas that lost the most heat. Those regions also received the least exposure to the sun and weren’t utilized as much as the upper body’s paddling muscles.” 

Interestingly, “When researchers have tracked surfers’ activity, they’ve found that surfers spend the majority of time paddling during a session, followed by sitting idle. They only actually surf between 2 percent and 5 percent of the time.” 

Anyway, Hurley, back before Nike sold it and it became a beard oil, electric bike and inflatable jetski outlet, built a suit based on the principles of thick in the leg, lighter rubber on the guts – 4mm legs, 3mm lower guts and back, 2mm in the chest, upper back and arms. 

Nope. Marketing couldn’t work out how to sell ‘em. 

Traditionally, wetsuits are named by their thickness. A 4/3-millimeter suit, for instance, is understood to mean that the thickest neoprene (4 millimeters) is wrapped around the core, while the thinnest neoprene (3 millimeters) covers the extremities. Since the new Hurley suit had the thickest neoprene in the legs, thinned as it reached the torso, then thinned some more in the chest and arms, it was confusing to use those traditional measurements. They ended up calling it the Advantage Max 3/2 Plus. 

And, then, Hurley went beard oil, and John John fled to start his own brand along with Bob Hurley and former Hurley VP Bruce Moore. 

Moore hadn’t forgotten about Nessler and Newcomer’s research, and Florence Marine X applied the professors’ findings when designing the first Florence Marine X wetsuit, which went on sale last year. The first batch quickly sold out despite its $750 price tag. It’s the first suit to incorporate Nessler and Newcomer’s research on regional temperatures in the body since the Hurley Advantage Max 3/2 Plus, using 3 millimeters of neoprene on the legs and lower torso, while covering the arms, upper chest, and upper back with 2 millimeters of rubber.

And the Advantage max 3/2 Plus for Hurley, which is still out there, ain’t made by the same high-end co’s as it was when Nike so maybe prudent to avoid.

Can’t win for losing etc. 

"Everyone looks good in black and no one’s going to judge you in black."

The Italian surfer Leonardo Fioravanti was one of the many professional surfers to become decapitated by the World Surf League’s extremely controversial mid-year cut and, therefore, he is now at Manly, in Australia, watching longboarders ply their trade while waiting to ply his own in an attempt to claw back onto the championship tour.

A great indignity, one that Fioravanti made no bones about from the aforementioned Manly in a revealing new interview with The Sydney Morning Herald.

He told the journalist that he “surfed angry” at Snapper, the first event after the cut and “I don’t agree with (it) but that’s what the WSL want to do, and at the end of it all, I wasn’t consistent enough to stay in it, and that’s on me, and nobody else.”

I, for one, will miss him as I think the Quiksilver sponsored surfer and “face of Gucci” brings something different to the dance.

Style, for one, plus fashion and the young Italian speaks openly about the glorious land of glamor and gorgeousness.

“It’s a different world, I love it. In our world you get judged a lot for your surfing style, who you sponsor with or whatever and that’s how it goes. But in fashion, you can be whatever the f–k you want to be. You can dress however you want, nobody’s going to judge you for it, they’re going to respect you for it. That’s so cool for me. The first fashion show I went to, I was only dressing in black. Everyone looks good in black and no one’s going to judge you in black. Now if I’m going to a Gucci show, give me the craziest shit you’ve got. It’s so cool, and I know they’ll never judge you for it. Give me different every time.”

Yes, I will miss Fioravanti and I truly hope that his being fed to the Great Wall Motors will not taint his brand.

Our World Surf League has blown multiple narratives since transitioning the Association of Surfing Professionals to its current visage six-ish years ago but maybe none more than the recent blowing of professional longboarding. The format most practiced by most has, recently, been mocked and fun made and goofed upon at the very highest levels in professional surfing’s executive suite even though starving fans crave the sweet science.

Read here here here etc.

Silly business, especially seeing that the aforementioned League one day dreams of making surfing a business but are you not convinced?

Do you need a passionate defense of the merits of our favorite pastime’s origins?

Well, a just uncovered clip, featuring the legendary Robert “Wingnut” Weaver has resurfaced and that aforementioned League should be extremely bummed.

You will certainly remember Wingnut from his star turn in The Endless Summer II. As a younger Oregonian child, I drove three hours each way to watch Bruce Brown’s other masterpiece, also starring Pat O’Connell, in the theater.

Continued shame, anyhow, on the World Surf League.

Or as Noa Deane proclaimed…

And thanks to The Surf Network for lost footage. Much more is there and only the foolish don’t subscribe.

The plight of our longerboard brothers and sisters has taken another turn toward the un-chill. It was reported, here, yesterday that their champion tour season opener was kicking off in Manly, Australia except with zero promotion headed in. Fans became outraged, taking to various social medias and demanding account. This, of course, another in a long line of indignities spooned upon their surf bucket hat heads by the World Surf League.

You will certainly recall, months ago, when it was rumored that the WSL was set to cut the longboarding world tour from three events to one. Sitting champion Joel Tudor caught wind and wondered about equality. The WSL quickly suspended him indefinitely for one year then proceeded to rub salt in that festering wound by announcing that three stops would be kept but two of them would be Manly and Huntington Beach. Tour commissioner Devon Howard resigned his post, forthwith, maybe not wanting to see his beloved dance soiled so.

And so yesterday Manly kicked off, with zero promotion and also zero coverage. No stream, no announcers, nothing but an Instagram message from WSL Senior Vice President of Tours and Head of Competition, and now longboard commissioner, reading, “I’m happy to be here in Manly to kick off our first event of the @wsl World Longboard Tour yesterday, and to be here supporting this group of surfers on the road to the World Title.”

She included a very unflattering photo drop, continuing the fun-making.

A post shared by Jessi Miley-Dyer (@jessmileydyer)

Well, Miley-Dyer may have been mocking with her own two eyes but the long-suffering longboard fan was locked out and forced to turn to static Surfline cameras for a fix.

Professional longboarding, at its very highest level, treated worse than a junior 1000 event.

Will fans revolt entirely? Will their heroes and heroines?

Currently more questions than answer.

Virality sure is a strange phenomenon, no? Moments captured and posted to social media that then, somehow, someway infect society racing from phone to phone, direct message to direct message until a little-known man or woman is suddenly, overnight, internationally famous.

Well, lightly-known bodyboarder Dan Leyshon, who hails from Australia, is currently experiencing the burning hot spotlight as his TikTok has just received hundreds of thousands of new visitors after he posted a video of himself sitting on a blue surfboard out at Snapper Rocks when someone, or something, swims under him and provides a vigorous jolt.

Leyshon wastes no time in paddling to shore and captioned the clip “Don’t panic unless it’s time to panic.”

You must watch here and ponder greater truths like “what would I have done had the same happened to me?”

Online sleuths immediately began wondering if the bumper was a shark, a killer whale or Gold Coast legend Dean “Dingo” Morrison.

Possible but there can be no certainty.

Hopefully Leyshon can use the new attention to reach higher rungs of fame and/or fortune.

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